Bonjour la Classe

As far as I know, the law of gravity still exists. So, no: I did not fall off the face of the Earth. Rather, I just happened to have started work and have been incorporating that into my schedule, and I didn't realize how long it had been since I posted a blog update. So, here you are.

The main thing I want to speak about is my job: teaching. Well, a teaching assistant. Ok, not really "teaching"...but rather a "language assistant" is what I'm called. I'm here to go to high school English classes to speak with the students and better their English by allowing them to speak to and hear a native speaker. It also gives them a way to ask questions and learn about American culture, education, etc. In addition, I will work with small groups in the classes and run through activities with them, dialogue with them on fictitious scenarios, and speak to them about business practices in America. (Some of the students are "BTS" - brevet de technicien supérieur - that is to say, they are high school graduates (post-baccalauréat) working on an advanced degree.)

My school has many, many English classes. I only work 12 hours a week. You do the math. They are wanting to me to see so many students, that I've been to a new class almost every single time for the past three weeks. This wouldn't be so bad if I was doing something engaging or actually working with the students. However, as anyone would be wont to do upon their first encounter with someone, the majority of my classes have been "Introduce Yourself" classes, with me speaking about myself and my life, and the students asking me questions. There are a few reasons why this is embêtant to me:

1 - Most of the students are often a) shy, b) nervous to speak English to someone who speaks it fluently, or c) too "cool" to participate in class. Which leads to many awkward silences when they aren't asking questions and their teachers are trying to prod them along.

2 - I basically get the same questions in every single class. From "How old are you?" to "Do you like French food?" - all the basics you could imagine. And when you've answered the same questions in 15 different classes, you get quite bored of yourself.

3 - On the rare occasion where there is a more interesting question, I am limited to how I can respond due to their (non)comprehension of the English language. For example, it's enough of a struggle to explain (in vocabulary that they will understand) their "universal healthcare" versus the American private system. So when they ask me how much it costs to go to a doctor, all I can say is "Pick a number between 0 and 100,000. Voila, someone has paid that much before." How can I explain copays and deductibles and in/out-of-network and HMOs and etc in a way that they'd understand? Hell, in America we have entire college courses - majors, even - dedicated to understanding that.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining...much. It's a pretty sweet set up I have here - only teaching 12 hours per week (albeit for a less-than desirable pay, but it's something at least), and the rest of the time I'm left on my own to live la vie française. I've just grown tired of hearing my own voice talking about myself in the most boring fashion possible (to my ears, at least).

At first, I likened these "introduction" classes to continuously watching the most boring autobiographical film ever about yourself. Over and over again. However, I'd like to make a slightly better analogy. Consider the facts:

• The students themselves are different in each class
• They sometimes ask different questions, but the same "core" questions are always there
• These "core" questions consist of a cursory look into my background, where I'm from, what I studied, my likes/dislikes, etc
• There are perpetual awkward silences
• Both parties are trying to fill the silent voids with something - anything - to help the time pass

Yes, ladies and gentleman, I think the better analogy would be to compare it to a string of unending, awkward first dates. Where you can tell neither of you is that interested, and you're just trying to get through the date. Look back over my list and you'll see that I'm correct. The only thing missing is that I don't have to pay the bill for a dinner.